May 24, 1975

At the time that my dad actually died which was early in the evening I was having dinner with some friends. Later on I told them about my dad’s death. They are still good friends even though they live a long way away.

So I was not in any space to make arrangements to get home to be with my mom. I did not have a car. So the company chauffeur from where my dad had worked and a neighbour drove up to get me. I have a strange memory of driving through the Quebec towns in the middle of the night.

When I got to the house in Lachute my mom was there with Kathi’s godparents. They were very close family friends. In fact they had been told of my dad’s death first and then had phoned my mom and came to the house and then told her. They left soon after and my mom and I sat up all night.

My sister was travelling that weekend and it was some time before we connected. Finally we got in touch with a friend who left a note at her apartment to phone as soon as she got home. She did that and I was the one to tell her that our dad had died.

My dad’s sister was living 2 doors over. The neighbour in between had noticed that the lights were on at the houses all night. Someone knocked on our door and again I had to tell them the news.

My mom’s sister and husband came to stay for a while. My dad’s dad and his second wife - Aunt Margaret - also came by. They very seldom came to our house. He was very upset.

My dad had worked just down the street. So that first weekday evening at about 5 o’clock my mom was in visible distress. My dad would never be coming home again from work. My sister and I sat with my mom.

My dad had been a Mason so we had a very short Masonic service at the funeral parlour. I remember nothing about the service itself. At the cemetery a close riding friend was there. She had lost her own dad some years before. She reached out her hand to grab mine.

At the house after the service some of the younger crowd - my friends and Kathi’s were sitting around on the stairs. I remember my mom saying later - I am glad your friends were there for you.

Kathi went back to Montreal to university and I went back to Ottawa. My mom was very lonely that first summer and I came home many weekends. At the end of July Kathi celebrated her 21st birthday. My mom was not up to doing anything special so Kathi’s godparents had a family gathering at their house.

Later that year my mom suggested that she and I take a trip together. So that was my first trip to England.